I used to get excited every time it rained!!

'I used to get excited every time it rained!!'

Too funny!

'Addiction' is an excuse for everything and anything. It's right up there with, "The devil made me do it!"

Sex addiction is just like food addiction and oxygen addiction.

SUCH A BIASED STORY!

Some experts say it is real. And at least as many say it isn't

Here's the deal, it DOESN'T matter. You can be addicted to anything. Watching TV. Cleaning a rug. Watching rocks roll around. Excercising. Eating right. Anything.

Basically, if a person is addicted to anything, it is an issue. If people want to set up industries so they can use 'addiction' as their new marketing tool, then they are going to just end up taking money from people who deserve to lose it. Smart people do what they have to, to get over their addiction, and for some, no matter what it is, it is as hard as it can be.

Addiction is a problem. Period. Some of the things you get addicted to end your life really fast. Some are harmless. Plenty fall between the two. The End. Now go do something about it if you have to and get support.

I always heard that if god didn't want you to masturbate he would have made your arms shorter !!!!!

People will say they are 'addicted' to anything to justify their actions.

I'm addicted to white tea and Caramello bars.

I don't eat 5-6 Caramello bars a day!

Not just men..........sorry to say. I don't think it's addiction. I think it's a power trip (or like notches in a gun). I am so sick and tired of excuses for bad behavior. Man up! I was married to a drunk who when ever things went wrong, got himself plastered even at nine in the morning. His excuse? It gave him solace. BS. You misbehave. You don't act like a grownup. You're gone.

I am so tired of the Twinkie defense. Or, as someone said, "The devil made me do it." Where's Geraldine when you need her?

OPto, That was Flip Wilson, Its not an addiction, have women figured out that by the time men reach a certain age and having had to deal with all the BS that we have to put up with, wooing women, dating women, marring women, LISTENING to women, arguing "POINTLESS" arguments with women, listening to women make a big deal over nothing, listening to women complain, that maybe just maybe we want to just be with one and not have to put up with all of your BS.

Comedian Patrice O'neal once asked in his standup how long do you think your man would stick around if you didn't have a "V" word? I am willing to bet it wouldn't last a year.

Ok now I'm gonna sit back and wait for the hate post to began.

Sex addiction is no more real than the Easter Bunny. You want the real scoop on sex or any other addiction, follow the money. As long as you can pay big bucks to get treatment and have some quack doctor who makes big bucks treating said addictions and issuing statements the client is cured (for a hefty price) anything anyone wants to try to avoid responsibilty for is called an additction and curable for enough money. I don't give a hoot about Tiger Woods and I did not watch his humilating public spectacle, but I'm positve that if he throws enough money at it, it will eventually go away and carry public sentiment with it.

I guess you could be gay if your so tired of wooing women and listening to thier, as you put it, "BS".

TO ALL OF YOU WHO THINK CHEATING OR MASTURBATING IS JUST MEN DOING WHAT MEN DO:

Would you wish this on your daughter and her husband? Your sister and her husband? What if your Daughter in Law did this to your son? What if your Sister-in-Law did this to your brother? What if it was your daughter or sister or mom on that porn site? It's somebody's mother, sister, daughter, grandma, or Aunt that this is being done to. Luke 6:31

Who cares. Go get laid. Tiger, you're the man.

Catrissa,

There are lots of cheating women out there.

Kirby, It's not so much what you are hearing, it's what the way women think. Men and women think differently. I've made an effort to figure out what men are saying and what/how they are thinking. Fortunately, it's not too complicated. (Sorry guys, but it's true.) Men tend to go for a solid solution without too many variables. Women, on the otherhand, are more complex thinkers when it comes to relationships. Everything is very interconnected. A very simplistic explanation is that men are straightline thinkers--very directional with a result at the end. Women are more three dimensional thinkers with a number of variables and a number of possible results, all depending upon the answers they try to extract from their male counterparts. So, please try to understand that the "thinking" (there's that T word again), isn't the same between the sexes. Both men and women need to be more understanding of these differences and try to work with them.

With all this being said, the "v" word isn't what lifelong relationships are about. Love, trust, compassion, integrity, quality of life, caring, and all those other seven dwarfs of commitment go along with the "I do's." When someone, male or female, makes that commitment to put the other person first in their life, then all others should fall by the wayside. That first person, if the feelings are reciprocal, will be putting their significant other to the forefront, too. No one loses.

In this case with TW, he shucked all of his commitment ideals toward his wife and family, and just did whatever he felt like. I don't see it as any sort of an addiction, I see it as a spoiled little boy who does whatever he feels like. Now that his hand has been caught in the cookie jar, I'll wait and see how he acts on it.

I'm addicted to reading these silly articles, then posting my opinion on this board.

Kirby.................It was Geraldine who said it.

Your must have picked some really MAHVELOUS women in your life to harbor such hatred. If you are married, I don't know whether to send the sympathy to you or your wife.

Catrissa wrote "TO ALL OF YOU WHO THINK CHEATING OR MASTURBATING IS JUST MEN DOING WHAT MEN DO:"

Men do something that women never need to do : take the word of their mate that the child is theirs.

R-tards simply hiding behind some "disease" to excuse their lack of self control.

Didn't the "puritans" land in Norte America 400 years ago? Abstinence is not a popular option for teens and monogamy is not a popular option for anyone who is married and telling the truth! Why can't we move beyond holding everyone to "puritanical" standards that don't even exist in our heads anymore!

I, for one, don't buy this addiction bull. Heck, if you followed Woods' own statement, he said that he did it because he thought he was entitled to the priviledges of being allowed to fool around because of who he was. So, the only question is whether he decides that he loves Elin enough (if she takes him back) to forgo all those priviledges that he feels entitled to. At this point it is a conscious choice. Along that line, I don't buy the claim of 80% success rate. Anyone familiar with addictions know that long-term (permanent) success rates on any treatments is only about one in twenty-three. Sure, there can be a significant amount of success for a year or two. But, what makes this sex stuff different than the usual chemical addiction is the personal interaction. What will happen if Tiger's sex with his wife decreases from say 5 times a week to 5 times a month or once a month? Will he "fall off the wagon" at that point? Is it even "falling off the wagon" at that point if he does stray? Obviously, many men and women have been in marriages where their partner just loses interest in sex. Does this amount to a breaking of the marriage contract on their part to refuse to be intimate with their spouse? Although not discussed often, it would seem to me that this is just as damaging to a relationship as an extra-marital affair is. Another way to approach it is if one spouse stops the sex, or doesn't do it nearly enough, then maybe it becomes an activity like golf, completely separate from the marriage.

Another thought: It would seem to me that masturbation should be allowed. Afterall, if one has a strong sex drive, what harm is there in he/she satisfying it by themselves, if the spouse is unwilling to do it that often. If the spouse understands the drive and supports the self-satisfaction, then all is well. If it is truly addiction because of sex-drive, this takes care of the problem. It is the "choice" of satisfying it with someone else that creates the problem.

In Mr Woods case she knew of this before they got married and he promised to stop. By that time he was probably in so far and so deep extricating himself would have been damn near impossible. After all he had a squeaky clean image to protect.

People that have no respect for others and no self-control. Always have a EXCUSE for their actions.

Because they are not willing to accept the consequences of their OWN actions.....

Wood's can play golf well and could make lots of money doing it. Public speaking and moral leadership - are his weak points.....

If you identify a "problem" in this area, fellas, please give all us females a break and don't ask us to marry you. We marry for love and for always. Some men marry because they don't think they should have to do their laundry. True statement!

You hit the nail squarely on the head. Most men don't have the will power but fear the consequences as you do. If there were no fear of the consequences more men would act exactly like TW did.

It's not willpower. It's ego-feeding.

Dman you hit it right on the head (I guess I can say that) humans are supposed to have sex and we are supposed to have it with as many people as we can, and the only thing stopping us are laws and the fear of lossing a great thing.

Kirby, you think men are supposed to have sex with as many people as we can. "What a crock"

I have had plenty of opportunity to have sex with other partners, but I made a commitment when I married my husband & my love for him & my honor kept me from being interested.

One morning I stopped to get fuel for my car & the owner of that station as well as about 50 others came out to my car & started talking, I had seen him many times & thought nothing about it. After taking for a few minutes, he asked me to go have a cup of coffee with him, "I told him sure, I would love to go, just let me go pick up my husband & son & I would be right back. The offer disappeared real quick. And by the way he was cute as h@ll plus had lots of money. Commitment is everything. DON'T GET MARRIED if you like to have multiple partners.

I have had plenty of opportunity to have sex with other partners, but I made a commitment when I married my husband & my love for him & my honor kept me from being interested

I think this is slanted more toward men. Men tend to stray more often.

It is all depending on the subject. Our bodies are "made" to do a lot of things. The fact that we are SENTIENT should mean something to all of you. It means we have the FREE WILL to choose whether or not to follow our instincts. Our world and our society is not that of an animal wandering through the jungle looking for our next prey and our next chance to pass on our genetic legacy. We are beings able to weigh pros and cons, cause and effect, and consider the consequences of our actions and urges. It is EMBARRASSING to be considered a human when you have other members of your species whining about how they can't control their primal urges. I have never cheated, and I never will. I have had women try to seduce me. I've had opportunities and gorgeous women almost beg me in a few cases. I am NOT an animal. I am a SENTIENT... and honestly I wish I didn't have to claim I was human because of how shameful some of us act. In all things they want to make excuses for who they are. Excuses for what they do. Don't they realize we are all subject to those same urges... and many of us DEAL WITH IT. Yeah I feel like having sex... SO? I feel like eating chocolate all day... SO? I feel like being violent and hitting someone... SO!?!?!?!?!? Where do you get off trying to shirk your responsibility on to some disease... or deity...or anyone other than yourself? Every human on Earth deals with the same horemones, the same brain chemistry, and the same primal instinctual urges that we have had since the dawn of time.

YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL. YOU ARE NOT EXCUSED.

A cheater is a cheater. They don't have a disease... they have a brain that functions like a child. They only think about what their body wants... and they will always do that because people are ignorant enough to believe that just because enough people are weak willed and are of course more than willing to accept complete and utter absolution for all of their wrong-doings. Ridiculous.

It isn't true. I am not "just another man". I am my own person. I have my own feelings, opinions, urges, and willpower. I will resist my urges because I know that life is better with structure and loyalty. I will accept and give love, and I will ALWAYS expect fidelity from myself and my partner. Cheating makes someone wroth less than nothing to me. I would obliterate a 10 year relationship if my partner cheated because I will not sit by while someone chooses to inflict pain and suffering on me for some sick moment of physical pleasure. That isn't what you do to someone you love. If they aren't happy and in love with me... fine. I will never fault someone for their feelings. If I am not the one for them I can't make myself something I'm not, but I deserve and EXPECT to be treated with respect. They can tell me they don't love me. They can leave me and start seeing someone the next day, but I refuse to be cheated on and have that person leave without knowing that they are the #1 most worthless person in the world in my eyes. Weak willed, selfish, and a disgrace to everything that we have the potential to be.

I would hope that I would be treated with the same contempt and disdain if I were to falter in that way. Anyone who excused my actions would be an idiot... because I obviously know what the effects of those actions are. Any intelligent human could say the same thing. If I know that cheating would cripple my partner emotionally, ruin my relationship, and cause me to feel horrible guilt... and I STILL do it... why the hell would I think I deserve any pity or forgiveness?

Good point about the women apologizing. Here's the thing; each of these women likely thought at some point he would leave his wife and children for them.

Having been married to a man with a similar problem I would tell those women that was very unrealistic. It's not just the sex acts, it's the anticipation and secrets. But for these men they don't want other wives. They want other sex, period. They love their wives and are very happy with that person. They want someone they know they can depend on to keep the home nice, take care of the children and make sure they're lives run smoothly. They never have any attention of abandoning that family.

So, any of those women who thought they were going to be the next Mrs. Tiger Woods were not only mistaken, but extremely naive. As you pointed out, they knew he was married, but didn't allow that to stop them from sleeping with him. They are no better than prostitutes as I'm sure they were all paid in some way.

Why would a woman want a married man that is cheating on his wife?? If he cheats on his wife he will surely cheat on her if giving the chance... The same goes for a woman that cheats on her husband. I could never trust a woman like that and could never be happy wondering if she is with someone else when I'm not around.....

Think of it this way . . . no one should want or want to be someone's sloppy seconds.

while i agree that a person-man or woman- should NEVER come between a married or commited couple, i don't hold them responsible nearly as much as the married person. yes those women are messed up but what did they have to lose? nothing, not their home or family. it was good fun and sex and money for them. tiger woods was the one who was married and made a commitment so he's the one who should have kept it in his pants, blaming the other person is weak.

Tough to argue with good logic.

a female invention? can you support that with some sort of evidence?

Those people who can't/won't be monogamous should just admit it to themselves and not get married, etc.

I don't believe in monogamy for myself. I would be bored to tears by week 2. Therefore, I will never marry.

I think both men and women, however, are responsible for the invention of monogamy, but I think it goes against instinct.

I would no more be monogamous that I would eat at the same restaurant for the rest of my life.

Problem with that is the children whom both parties love and want them to have a happy family life. Look infidelity is rampant in the world today. Live with it. We joke about the French and their Mistress's and the Spanish etc. Probably better than 75% of married people in this world at one time or another cheat on their spouses and that includes both men and women. Women are not pure as the driven snow by a long shot. I heard my neighbors wife complaining about her husband cheating on her to my wife once and I knew for a fact she was cheating on him with a guy i worked with at the time.

Just when I was about to give up and believe that men in america had been castrated, I run across you guys. Finally the truth is being told.

Males are very interested in paternal assurance. The deal is that men have always had a tendency to stray. That is the exact behavior that allows women to just wait and reject hundreds of suitors. The fact that so men cheat so little if at all after marriage is a testament to male personalo restraint.

Female cheating wouldn't be so bad were it not for the simple reality that they carry the child, which always had half of their genetic contribution. Modern technology provides us with DNA paternity tests. So, birth certification should use that test routinely.

If you want multiple partners, do not get married and do not have kids......

IMO - Marriage and monogamy is to protect the children, not just to restrict your sex drive..... It provides a stable environment to raise the children.......

I couldn't agree more! EVERYTHING today is some sort of "medical disorder" that requires "treatment." And like you, I'm not at all saying that there are not legitimate medical disorders. But when you begin calling your inability to respect your spouse and family some kind of medical problem, whether it's physical or mental, that is just a cop-out. Call it what it is - you just can't be bothered with behaving yourself!

JQ and SJB

I think you are both right on. Just an excuse. And unfortunately it goes beyond disorders etc.

Even if you do believe that calling it an addiction is an excuse, he's trying to fix it. He's trying to make sure that he doesn't do it again. He's accepting responsibility for his actions.

Even if you do believe that calling it an addiction is an excuse, he's trying to fix it. He's trying to make sure that he doesn't do it again. He's accepting responsibility for his actions.

I doubt it. I think his "treatment" and "regret" are PR moves to save what's left of his career. If he were responsible, he wouldn't have done it so much with so many in the first place. How many women are we up to? 25?

He's accepting responsibility for his actions.

Only because he got caught with his pants down. No other reason.

If his wife had applied a wood instead of a iron. TW would not be here today, with his excuses....... Maybe she will listen to her caddie, NEXT TIME.......

Dame

The number of women is what puts his problem into the addiction class. An affair is a one or two time thing. But the high number of women involved is not just having affairs. It's an addiction. If you enjoy a few drinks you are not an alcoholic. But if you can't get enough of it, you're an alcoholic. Why are we sympathetic to these people and recognize their addiction, when we call sex addicts every name in the book? Is it because it's something we have been taught to look at as taboo? It's real and I know someone who has had this problem. There's no easy fix and I give Tiger lots of credit for seeking treatment. His comments yesterday were part of his treatment. He had to confess, out loud to those he cares about, that he was wrong. I'm sure his confession to Elin, in private, as it should be, came first. He cares enough about her and his children to humiliate himself to all. I'm sure this is the hardest thing he has ever had to do in his life. Let's back off.

Maybe. I think of those things more along the lines of character flaws.

Having seen the other side of the spectrum yea its a real addiction.

You equate the good a high off the good feelings of sex, therefor you want it more and mroe and more.

My wife was raped when she was 16.. She associates the feelings of being raped anytime she has sex.. So she does not have much of a sex drive.

So if the Sex addiction is not a mental disorder/disease/whatever you want to call it.. Then neither is the reverse that my wife is suffering from.

They go hand in hand. You dominate in business and the reward is sexual favors from all types of the opposite sex. Now as i stated earlier this goes for both sexes. I have known female power brokers in business that act exactly the same way.

In Thai society, you are judged by how well you take care of your 'Family'......

It is accepted in Thailand for those with social power and wealth, to have multiple mistresses.... Having multiple wives was still legal until the late 1950's in Thailand... And presently the The future King of Thailand has multiple wives........

This does not justify TW's actions, only provides some prospective......

My wife is Thai and she has no respect for Thai men, because of this accepted custom.....

see my reply in7.2..

your sadly mistaken with it not being real.

In Mr Woods case I would say he is an example of a person who I would agree who may have this condition. He is one of the strongest people on earth when it comes to concentrating on the game he dominates. He walks around the course in a daze. He may cuse for a moment or toss a club now and then but he snaps right back to the 1005 concentration on the next shot in the blink of an eye.

Now for a guy to have that much control (he won the US Open (Toughest tournament in golf) on one leg. ) The other leg had a fracture and a torn ligament in his knee.

Now when a person has that much will power it seems he could easily resist temptation unless he had a flaw.

So sorry...i'm not a huge fan of conflict, I know that I don't know EVERYTHING and if someone cheated on me, it's because they wanted to and didn't think i would find out. I know exactly why it happened. Most of my female friends would agree. I can't imagine Elin going, "Well, he's going to cheat eventually but I'll marry him anyway because i want this stress in my life and i might as well make it worse by having kids, too." Doesn't that sound like fun?

You can imagine Elin saying "If I marry Tiger, my kids and I are super rich financially for life. If he cheats, at least I have half the money and a few houses?"

Are you serious? Everyone is sorry after getting caught. There would be nothing to be sorry about if they were not caught.

Just listen to any politician that is caught with his pants down or in a scandal. They always are sorry and accept full responsibility for their actions. So what? No consequences and life goes on.

Philosophically people are sorry because they were caught if you're not caught there is nothing to be sorry about.

That's true ,,,,,,we're only sorry if we're caught .

Eddie............>What best gene? Tiger? Duchovny? These are just normal human beings. They are not exemplary in ANY way. Stop trying to immortalize them.

Tiger was just another human being that has the desire to have more than one sex partner. His Genes are no more exemplary than the next humanbeings

I don't think "sex addicts" are any "worse", on a morality scale if you will, than a "food addict" who can't stop eating.

Either way, one has to take responsibility for one's own actions.

Greg..........>If you overeat you really only hurt yourself. If you cheat, you hurt many. Therein lies the difference.

I sure don't want to place "my morality values" on any one else but myself,,,,,

I believe the human condition is often driven by self serving desires and ego ,,,,,I believe that Tiger has all the ingredients to put his own morality values to the test : money , exceptional talent that is recognized by many , power , unlimited resources ,,,,,,,,,,It's only natural that other's ( ego driven women) are going to want to involve themselves in that arena ,,,,,,

I don't judge Tiger

I think as humans we use excuses for our behaviors ,,,,,,,,,It keeps us from looking at the "not so attractive side " of how we behave

You're equating cheating with viewing images of naked women?

Michelle-430408

I think your friend is the one who needs help ,,,,,,,,,,,,She allows herself to be treated this way by her husband. "Let recovery begin with me"

Ian Blokesworth

"You're equating cheating with viewing images of naked women?"

Why wouldn't masturbating be cheating? A person is not satisfying themselves with their partner while looking at porn. They are satisfying themselves while looking at another woman. Why wouldn't it be cheating to you?

Catrissa

There are plenty of married couples that have different levels of sex drives. His wife obviously thinks his is too high, but I bet he thinks hers is way too low. To equate porn with actually cheating with another woman is ridiculous to 99% of men. I think it makes men less likely to cheat on their spouses because they have an outlet for what is a physical feeling to us. If his wife took an interest in his porn viewing, and made it fun for both of them, I bet he'd be viewing a lot less porn, and connecting with his wife much more.

It's the judgmental attitude of the wife that makes him feel like it's something dirty, or perverse. Lighten up women... we really aren't very sexually complicated. TRY to make it new and fun for us, and we'll love you for it all the more.

Is watching the food channel the same as eating? Is browsing expensive handbags on-line the same as owning? I reading a murder in a book thr same as witnessing? No. It's all fleeting fantasy.

Now, is using a vibrator or thinking of another man while masturbating cheating to you?

ck..............My goodness. You really hate your mother-in-law.

Love to make fun of my Ex-mother in law :)

Can say nanny nanny boo boo now.

The media seems to hate Tiger Woods. Have read a lot of things on the net that indicate Men and Women are pretty equal in regards to infidelity. The reasons vary and I think sex addiction is stupid. Notice that this article also focused on Internet porn. Guess what....men tend to be visually stimulated creatures and will likely never stop watching Internet porn or "combing our hair in the bathroom". This article failed to address a lot of other reasons people cheat on their spouses. When was the last time you felt comfortable saying to your significant other "it isn't your fault, I just feel like screwing someone else for a few". God forbid anyone step up and say "it is your fault, im not cheating because I need to go out and have sex. Is because my home life sux and I need escape."

Good post! I never believed in "addictions". I agree, it's a character issue. People fall for all kinds of crap that's served to them by "experts". Blind leading the blind!

Yes , I think this is a good post also

Not a good post. Shame on William. I can only guess that if you do run a mental health clinic, you have become one of the many(not all) jaded medical professionals who have spent so much time in the industry that you have reduced capacity for empathy and compassion and you lump everybody into the same category. I've worked there and seen it. It's the main reason I got out of it. I couldn't stand to work with the long timers who were completely callus because " they had seen it all" and had long since stopped treating the mentally ill with any respect as human beings.

Of course I believe that most human being are not capable about caring or being able to empathise about something that hasn't happened or affected them personally. Some examples are Chris Reeves not being a stem cell advocate until becoming paralyzed or Mike J. Fox being an advocate for Parkinson after he was diagnosed with it or the woman who started M.A.D.D losing so a loved one to a drunk driving accident.

You can't tell me that brain chemistry and the pleasure derived from the brain from certain activities doesn't have anything to do with addiction. Otherwise why do scores of mental health professionals push Prozac and other serotonin re-uptake inhibitors which is all about GASP brain chemistry being out of whack for depression.

And let us try and remember that mental health experts don't always get it right. I think we all remember the medical wonder of the frontal lobotomy with the ice pick. Such a miracle of science that. Or how about some early electro-shock therapy. Or the fact that the age limit on Prozac and anti-depressants have been constantly raised because of increased suicide risk. The point being that the "mental health professionals" don't always get it right either and rarely want to admit it.

Some Lame Name Here,

Do you think that people like Woods are unfortunate victims of an adiction? Do you think the experts can help ?

sex addiction is real, however not everyone who cheats on his wife is sex addicted, sex addiction is like anything that people become addicted to, the the behavior is rewarded with a neurochemical payoff and an emotional payoff,

and just because its not in the DSM now or in the next incarnation does not mean it wont find its way there eventually. there are many examples of the DSM changing its views on mental illness over the years and it continues to evolve....ironically there is discussion of removing pedophilia from the DSM.

the problem is psychologists are inept at treating mental illness and so rather than trying to work on effective treatments they just wave their magic wand and reclassify "eh,..now your not mentally ill " so now they don't have to bother...thats what they are dealing with now with the paraphilias...they are at a loss as to how to treat these people, and so they are going to drop the ball...remove them from the DSM, and let the cards fall as they may,... lazy psychology.

don't know if tiger is a sex addict for sure, but if any of the stories are true he likely is...the efficacy of the 12 step program is probably greatest if the individual actually wants to stop...as with most addicts they love the drug more than anything else, and will lie and deceive people into believing they've changed when all the while they are plotting ways to get their next fix.