Obviously you are the man of the house. Your big job is to go to work, and maybe mow the lawn. If you have no children for the job. While the woman of the house cleans, cooks, shops, pays the bills, makes all drs. appts., provides transportation, laundry, mending, etc. I'd like your version of equal rights.

Go MAYZEY!! Couldn't agree more. He has no idea.

Mayzey, he's right, women arehaving more anxiety because they are WORKING more, you don;t feel anxiety for housework sorry, (oh know the luandry's not don, im so stressed), is not the same as (tommroow at my job i have ten things to get done or i may be fired).......

Really, you mean all I have to do now is go to work, get a 25% pay raise, mow the grass every week or so and hang out with my buddies a couple nights a week?

Woo HOO! I'll even make the once in a while Mac n cheese dinner and run the dishwasher once a week.

You are so freakin clueless!!!

Humby, for your information, women are not only doing housework, but also working, going to school in many circumstances, taking care of the children. I don't know where your living, but id love to only worry about laundry. Get real

Reaves +1

humby (& other men), We work 40-50 hours per week for our employer and then work another job (home) for our husbands & families.

What I find disturbing is the way that men claim to love their wives, but have no problem watching them come home from the day job and then work until bed time, while they relax for the evening. They are taking advantage of womens kindness, taking the work they do for granted, show absolutely no concern for her quality of life and expect her to always be cheerful and eager to please, while being treated like a servant! Men would never stand for the lopsided work load of the average couple nowadays. But they call it love when inflicting on women. There are mature, sensable, and fair minded men with integrity in the world, but not many.

Oh here we go- the overgeneralized 'all men are lazy' according to women who are such martyred victims. Get over yourselves- most men have tremendous responsibilities I know and also spend hours at the soccer field with their kids, tending to house chores only they are physically capable of handling and getting up at 2am to their screaming infants. In other words, many men are far more responsible than what is being suggested here and lumping all men into this lazy category is inaccurate and frankly ignorant. If you feel you are being taken advantage of it's because you have made yourself into a victim, teaching your hubby by your behaviors. If you feel something is intentionally being done against you then it's because you are half the problem in a marriage that lacks communication. So grow a pair, stand up and tell it like it is to your mate- but don't sit back and judge off the entire male race by some worn out stereo type that doesn't adhere to reality.

Why is anxiety amongst women on the rise?

The answer is because of Sarah Palin. She gives women a bad rap.

No, no, no....women's anxiety is on the rise because men drive us crazy.

I think you are all a bunch of spoiled cry babies!

Why don't you be more GRATEFUL that you have a washing machine, and food to eat, and just pace yourself in life.

If you want all that responsibility then crack that whip and make your husband help you or don't give him any nookie.

You are undercrediting yourself. We women DO have the power, that's right, so use it to your advantage, and put your husband to work! You just have to know how to convince him to make him think it is HIS idea.

But, I bet if you had to live one week in poverty in a 3rd world country, or even let's say go on Survivor, you would quit your WHINING!!!!

Women would not be getting stressed or get anxiety disorders if they stuck to their natural position: Keeping the kids quite so I can watch the game and getting my food ready. The only stress they should have would be to make sure my beer doesnt get warm.

A real man does not need to be a cruel bully to feel good about himself. Man up, unless you actually are about 12.

Stop whining ladies. If you man is lazy then either accept it, work it out or leave him. You aren't going to like this, but the "men are lazy" mantra is a myth. Google Slate - Couch Entitlement if you are interested in actual data rather than hyperbole.

Its people like you that inspire women never to give up the women's movement. If men were acting like fathers, then women would not have to raise them alone. Women, in the majority of cases do not leave, its the men.

Yippee!!!! Finally somebody feels and says how I do.

I'm the one who left the kids' dad. He was an abusive SOB who was as useless as the day was long. I barely got out with my/our life(s). You want to talk anxiety, we can talk anxiety. But I've got better things to do with my life these days. I've worked to put it behind me (30 years ago) and to become a better person, mother, and grandmother. I'm still working at all of it. Anxiety? Who doesn't have it? Let's work on something that we can actually do something about, like living better and taking care of one another. Living well beats the socks off of worrying all the time or taking a pill to checkout of reality.

(I am writing about life experience. I know some folks have medical problems that include anxiety attacks as symptoms, and I do not wish to make light of them. My anxiety is just anxiety with living. It's a pain, but I deal with it. Best wishes to all.)

Amen zapper, I was married to a total jerk for 14 yrs, black eyes, bruises and all. Ive since been on my own and bought MY OWN washing machine, BRAND NEW CAR paid off in less than 3 1/2 yrs, new couch and other expensive items all paid off by ME. NOT any man or the dumb jerk of an ex I married. HE did the BARE minimum while I cut coupons, mowed the grass, trimmed the trees, cleaned the garage, baked bread AND sewed my daughter her fluffy dresses. And the idiot couldnt even say so much as thank you or even spend time with me. I used to get migrains when I was with him and had several "painless" migrains that I told the doc about. Funny when I finally left the jerk after he told ME I was the loser the migrains stopped. I depend on no one, that first marriage taught me a BIG lesson. Men dont cause stress??? Palleeeeese....

Men tend to divide up life's responsibilities and when their 20% gets to be too much they leave!

Truth is not whats speaking to you buddy.

Really 'truthspeak' this attitude is not even 'truthiness'! What work/thoughts would you like us to leave to you? Which worry would you like to take on? If men are better at certain things then why are they not stepping up! There are more female college graduates and now for the first time more PhD's awarded to women then men? As far as I can see many men have the time to play on their Xbox or watch/attend sporting events while we run the kids to soccer and bring home the smaller paycheck. You are right we are wired differently thank god someone will get up with the baby in the middle of the night!!!!!

Could a shift in cultural values be to blame? [8th paragraph]

All of these factors hit women harder than men because, experts are learning, we may be wired to worry. Just-released research from the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia suggests that the female brain may be more sensitive to stress hormones and less able to adapt to high levels of them. We also have a well-known propensity to ruminate and let problems roll around and around in our heads, says Nolen-Hoeksema: “We’re more aware about our feelings, and we get more hung up on them than men do.”

With apologies to the rare man who actually does share the work-load equally:

Problem is that although women have taken up the load traditionally done by men, ie bringing home the bacon, men are loath to take up the burden traditionally done by workmen, ie house work and child rearing. It doesn't help that traditional women's work has always been horrendously under-valued, and that even today, the term itself - women's work - is used in apejorative manner,

One of my pet peeves is the term "he helps out around the house," because the implication is that it's HER job to do all the housework, and he gets enormous kudos if he does two loads of laundry on Saturday. Sorry, folks, but we're well past the era of a separation of labor into men's and women's chores. And until men do their fair share, which means better than twice what they do now, according to every survey taken in this country, ever, women will have problems such as those discussed in this article.

And to those men on this board who have the hutzpa to list exactly how little they do around the house, pat themselves on the back and act as if they shared the work-load equally with their wives: shame on you. If you have even an ounce of honesty in your bodies, make a list of what needs to be done around the house on a regular basis, then check off the chores you do, and see how much is left. That should be an eye opener for the vast majority of you!

Same here. If your brain makes too much cortisol, it's not something you can fix by lighting candles and meditating to mood music or talking to a therapist. I have a great life and I balance my family and work well, but I'm still on a low dose of Wellbutrin to keep the anxiety symptoms at bay. Interestingly, I have a mitral valve prolapse (a minor, non-dangerous heart value aberration that is far more common in women than men) and a cardiologist once told me that MVP and anxiety disorder often go hand-in-hand.

TraceyS: Yes, mitral valve prolapse not only is far more common in women than men, but also is associated with anxiety disorder. That's why a thorough physical examination should be part of the evaluation of anxiety symptoms.

Troglodyte. Somebody's a smartypants.

Iola, there is a HUGE difference between normal worry and an anxiety disorder. Obviously, you've never had one. Attitudes like yours is why people don't want to seek help.

I was just diagnosed with a panic disorder and severe anxiety and yes, I am on medication. Two of them, in fact (but I haven't had to take the one for a couple weeks). It isn't just your mind that is affected. A real honest to goodness anxiety disorder has physical symptoms just like any other disease. My panic attack was so severe, I ended up in the emergency room.

For me, this past month since my diagnosis has been physically and mentally debilitating for me to the point where I could not physically function without taking medication. I also could not sleep. You can't just "shake it off" or will it to stop. Doesn't work that way. Anyone who uses this as an excuse to fail won't past muster at a doctor's office. You can't fake this stuff. I don't know anyone who would want to fake this, either.

Unless you've had this yourself, you really have no clue at all. Get off your high horse.

msannomalley you are so right on target here! All of us worry but an anxiety disorder is so much more. My panic attacks left me so drained that I could not function and I was always afraid of having another one and if anyone looked at me I thought I was going to die! I now take a medication and it has saved my life. I am 46 years old and wondered my whole life what is wrong with me until I finally got a really good Dr. who figured it out....and yes not all meds work for everyone...I had to try 3 different kinds to find the one that worked for me...of course I still worry sometimes like most people but I am free of those crazy and irrational fears and can enjoy my life now....it's been 5 years now since I had a panic attack.

My POINT ladies is that this study becomes yet another argument against which we find ourselves having to defend our gender. It had nothing to do with your individual diagnoses.

Neither gender is better than the other, but this study might lead an idiot to believe that women are the weaker sex. That we are biologically incapable of handling everyday stressors. Which brings me back to my original statement that I dislike these studies and I really dislike the way the media presents it.

Now that I have checked, "Dorking around with anti-feminists online" off of my to do list, I can move on to more important things to do.

@Kirk...I have my moments. :)

Lola, I understand your point, but you can't worry about what the idiots will think. We've spent too much time as women trying to prove ourselves (which we've done) while pleasing others (which is a waste of time except with your immediate loved ones). Men have their gender-linked burdens to bear as well...they still commit 95% of violent crime, and that is directly linked to the way they are wired.

Thank you Tracey. I know it shouldn't phase me. But it does. If a woman has any success in the corporate world, all a man has to say is, "She slept her way to the top." And there goes all her credibility.
If a man marries a woman ten years his junior, he's a husband. If a woman marries someone ten years her junior, she's a 'Cougar'. And there's many more charming epithets that are hurled around at random.

Anyway. I've had my rant for the moment. I will now enjoy family time with the most wonderful man in the world who brought home dinner.

I agree about the "cougar" label. Can't STAND it. My husband is 10 years younger than me, we've been together nine years and have a child together. I fell in love with his person, not his age. The "cougar" thing implies that I'm putting on Jimmy Choos and lingerie and seducing him around the martini shaker at night, when in reality we're just building a life together.

@ msannomalley:

When I was 15, I suddenly began to suffer panic attacks for fear of a heart attack. Because of them, I was only eating about one meal every day or two, my arms and legs became very cold and stiff, and I regularly felt chest pain and palpitations. Even when my mother assured me I was fine, I forced myself to not believe her since my life was possibly on the line.

After nearly a month of constant fear and a buzzing head due to out-of-control adrenaline, I finally wound up in the E.R. after freaking out in a noisy restaurant. While all I really needed was a doctor to confirm that I was in ship-shape, I was prescribed with some lorazapam 'just incase.' I've since had it under control without the need for medication, but I still hold on to it, since my panic attacks normally come from nowhere.

I agree that you really can't shake off a panic attack, since it is different from normal worry, like worried what to do for dinner or if you'll be late to something. In my case, my panic was caused by the fear of death. Doctors themselves say it is one of the worst feelings to ever experience, and they were surprised I hadn't hastened my death through suicide after being in constant fear for over a month. Fear of death, doctors say, will often seize a person's mind, freeze their lifestyle, and possibly cause their death either through suicide or even hypothermia (I kinda experienced that). So if anyone calls you a wimp for having panic attacks, they're the real wimp, since they likely don't know what it's like to feel like you're dying.

Lucky you!

Read poetry.

Go to the park on a pleasant day. Lie down in the grass. Look at the clouds.

"Read poetry. Go to the park on a pleasant day. Lie down in the grass. Look at the clouds."

When you've got young children, a full-time job, a household and a budget to manage, those things become just one more task to add to your already too-full to-do list. And it's not going to help you if your brain just produces too much stress hormone.

save your strength for things that you can change, forgive the rest, and let go.......learn to pick your battles wisely

Hence my comment about not letting social pressure determine your childbearing. You do not have to become pregnant to please other people. This is an ancient social force, but now there options.

TraceyS, if you are trying to do all of those things alone, take a hard look at what is creating the situation. If you find yourself having to over-perform, someone else is under-performing. Set limits on the demands of others--learn to say "No" firmly, and insist that partners do their part--like pay child support or take on responsibility for specific household chores or take the children out of the house so you can sleep in Saturday morning. Yes, you very likely are able to go to a park. Those relatives who kept asking "So, when are you going to start a family?" should be asked to help with children's care. Join with other mothers in a cooperative baby-sitting effort. Get professional help if you simply cannot cope with three kids under age four.

But, do not shift responsibilities to an older child. Than eight-year-old daughter whom you ask to watch her three- and four-year-old brothers is not only too young for the responsibility but also is very likely to resent her situation when she is older.

Just breathe.

Ahh, from psychotic to delusional. What a relief.

Ah, why would you attack a method that might work for someone in a desperate situation? Do you feel better?

I have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder by multiple doctors and put on prescriptions that made it all worse. The best thing I have found is a walk outside ALONE, yoga and exercise! I know it is hard to make the time but in just a few weeks you will feel the difference. Studies have shown exercise is AS effective as drugs. Good luck and deep breaths.

Thanks Kariology I do keep meaning to exercise, but no more excuses! At the very least it should help me sleep at night : ) I like yoga, but loved tai chi in college. I actually contemplated taking it again without the credit just so I could have it for another semester, but alas its a waste of money. Perhaps when things are better I can sign up for a night session.

Mona Bones, just when will "things" be "better"? "Waste of money"? No, a "waste" of yourself. You ARE confused.

Dear polyhedron,

You are the one confused and I suggest some introspection of yourself as to why you said this to Mona.

She is not confused, but is just on her path in life and trying to better herself.

Yes, that's probably what our grandmothers would say. Luckily, we know now that things aren't always that simple and that there's nothing wrong with taking appropriate medications for health problems, such as anxiety disorders.

Women in my grandmother's time were frequently prescribed lithium. Not my grandma. She would go to Bingo and win cash.

Dear Daisy in St. Louis,

I TOTALLY DISAGREE! Medications are the LAST resort for these problems.

Did you NOT read the article at all?

Amen to my southern sista!!

Reaves, you have serious issues. I can understand you hate men because he didn't give you child support. But you know what... you should have hired a better lawyer if you are such a baddass female. oh and by the way, do you hit your boyfriends over the head with how awesome you are? I'm sure it hasn't gotten old yet... hearing you brag about yourself.

HUMANS ARE EMOTIONAL BEINGS, NOT JUST WOMEN. It's amazing to me how women have convinced themselves that they are so much better at everything than men are. Everyone is an individual, and not everyone is as intelligent in all areas as other people. Reaves, noone wants to be with you because you say things like, get a life, and little fella. I'm so sure you're a real class act that everyone wants to hang around.

In the end, I didn't need his money. And, for your information, all child support cases in the state of Florida are handled the same way, no matter how much money you have. I am very happily married. Im sure your such a class act that you can't take the heat on you. Remember, Im not the only one who has not agreed with your posts. And, I do think women are the superior beings, and so does my husband.

More and more men are not paying child support every year,,,,,,and we are neurotic?? Uh ok little fella

"Women have always been neurotic."

Someone has got to be, or nothing would ever get done. Every relationship needs a grown-up in it, and increasingly, it's on us women.

Not neurotic so much as detail oriented and able to multi-task.

Whenever I read dribble like this from women that don't need men, I am always reminded of my own thoughts.... I don't want you either.

We may not need men, we may or may not want them. You can't handle the fact that unlike the past, we do not NEED yall, now, its a matter of whether or not we want you. There are wonderful and great men.....just not in abundance.

Uh paleeze!! Get over yourself. A woman now has a choice to who SHE wants to be. I am a woman, so please do not preach to me on what my role should be. Get a fricken life. Some might be thrashin around because of no help from men, but that too is ok, because guess what ......we are learning to do it by ourselves, and with grace, class, and dignity.

"Women used to have a defined role and they were good at it."

Clearly you have a thin grasp on history.

Reaves is a woman, so don't preach to her. In other words, don't ever express your opinion because it's wrong. When you don't have a penis, you are suddenly correct about EVERYTHING.

Are you serious? Dude, you are embarrassing yourself. The great men are screaming for you to shut up.

Reaves...WAY TO GO! I'm in FL too, and I KNOW the inadequate support you received. Florida is 49th in the nation in the quality of it's social programs and fightin' hard for 50th! Congratulations for hangin' in there, obviously working your butt off and reaching a hard fought goal.

Well done!

Be talkin' to you.......Webrydr

No, we are quite aware that many men are as you say "unstable." (By the way don't get hysterical, there are very great and wonderful men out there)

Once again, whomever responded to me, didn't actually hear what I was saying. And calling me "hysterical" as in going crazy is not an acceptable viewpoint to what I was saying. In point of fact, you are merely part of the problem. You completely missed the point and that is, Anxiety is real for everyone, and not just for women. The other point that I was making is that I know that men are great and wonderful. I know this because I am constantly treated like crap by the likes of YOU! Maybe you should ask yourself why ANY man would want a relationship other than for kids or sex. Friends are totally better for getting rid of loneliness than a relationship. WHY? Because when a man gets into a relationship, they instantly go from "aww he's awesome" to "the guy I'm dating, that's always slightly wrong, that hasn't put a crown on my head yet." If anything women have become more anxious because guys have figured out that we don't need a woman to be complete. Women don't add anything to a guys life except stress, anxiety, frustration. That first flirt/smile you get from someone is as good as it will ever get.

AAww, have you gotten burned? Well so sorry. We all have. You are saying that women only bring stress, anxiety, and frustration? Sounds like you do need meds. Strong women don't need a crown, but respect. And, you really wonder why your single? I think I know!

And by the way, Ive never met you, so I think we are projecting a wee bit.

My mother in law had her doc want to prescribe klonopan and prozac....she too found out, 5 years from onset, her problem was her thyroid. Anxiety wasn't her only symptom....

Glad you found it was your thyroid before you started a prescription. I know a person who has been taking an anti-anxiety med...it's nasty stuff, so nasty her therapist passed away and her MD was prescribing it because she HAD to, otherwise she'd end up hospitalized due to withdrawal.

well good luck with Dr's I've been in cronic pain for 10yrs now. I can't get disability, it's work or die. Dr's don't know much about pain, how could they?

Many of us commit suicide I consider it a few times a week. My mother was one of those who did nothing but criticize men. So I avoid women, and men and children. When my 8hrs is up I hide, and wait for the pain to ease up, it never does.

People need to help each other, the fatcats make loads of money dividing us, making us fear each other. Turn off the TV, and listen to someone. Maybe even your self.

Quite true. The media uses fear to grab our attention. No thanks to crime shows (doesn't matter whether it's fiction) or slashers. The more "interesting" and rarer crimes get priority who'd be interested by the murder of an old man? Unless it wasn't brutal no allot of people. The murder of a hot young woman is guarantied to get more viewers. Actually 80% of murder victims were male. The rise in anxiety disorders in women is a direct result of this. Because men are portrayed by the media of being capable of defending themselves the effect of this imposed paranoia is rather than being afraid of walking next to hedge rows in an urban park the rise of fire arm sales. Owning a gun mean your ten times more likely to be shot. Logically if you threatened an armed robber with a gun he is more likely to fire and probably won't hesitate for long och.

Rico, she doesn't have to date , which Im sure she does, to be totally satisfied within her life. See women are like that, we don't have to sleep with a hundred guys, or be married to feel good about their lives. Now, I have gotten through alot, and I have been through great stress, but it was worth it to graduate and get a great job. And for the record, only a real man can appreciate a strong, confident woman, maybe your sad that your not one of those men.

Rico - who cares?

I had better not date, Rico. My wonderful husband is the jealous type. And he's cute too. Big blue eyes and a remarkable...talent.

Reaverevees going on again about who is a real man... True, you don't have to date to be whole. And reaves, not every guy sleeps with hundreds of women.... maybe it's just the guys you go after. the "real" men. lol you're actually getting more pathetic the more I read your dribble. It's kinda funny in a way though. I love how people have to bring up single mothers to prove how strong women are. This is why I tell guys not to have kids in the first place. The chances that they grow up under your roof is slim at best.

You sound like a man that needs serious counseling. Single mothers are strong, stronger than you will ever know. You tell men not to have children? WOW. Do you tell them to not have sex unless they can support the children that perhaps they may make? You are just backing up what Im saying. You are making this oh so much fun.

Women are probably better at multi-tasking because we use the two halves of our brain more equally - or at least the interactions between the two halves is more efficient.

And there is a genetic component to anxiety, depression, and many of the various mental conditions. Your vulnerability to panic attacks is likely related to your mom suffering from the condition too.

Well said. When I had terrible panic attacks, I lost nearly 20 pounds, slept only about 2 hours a day or less, lost self asteem, used my inhaler at least 4-5 times a day, and cut myself off from friends and became hostile to family. With little sleep and food, it made my stress even worse.

All I really needed was a doctor to run a few tests to convince me I was fine, but my mother tried a few of her own methods to 'cure' me of my panic, which caused me to suffer from panic attacks even longer since she didn't want to take me to the clinic. She almost refused to take me to a doctor, convinced I was fine, while I don't think she knew how much I was suffering. Several times I would take a knife to my throat and hold it there, wondering if it would be worth it. I had become so afraid of death, I was almost finished with waiting for it to happen that I would do it myself.

I finally managed to have my father, who really saw me suffering, take me to the hospital's E.R. when I ran out of a noisy restaurant and began to pace back in forth in the parking lot, clutching my chest. When the doctors told me I was fine, I could breathe a sigh of relief. That, and a long-awaited good night's sleep, was the best medicine I could ever ask for. So this is my advice for those of you who suffer from similar situations: go to a doctor! That usually does the trick, and you'll be able to learn early on if there is a problem or not.

???????

Yes that's true "weed" weirds me out completely....our brain chemistry is very different and what works for some will not work for everyone....find what works for you and stick with it!

Alcohol can also dull feelings of anxiety and stress.

Both alcohol and marijuana are only temporarily masking the medical condition - and can often worsen symptoms in the long term. You still need professional help.