Dumbest post ever written in the history of mankind

Thank you for this insightful article. You can control your thoughts, and that greatly effects your mood. A good cure for depression is whenever you get a negative thought, right it in your log that's in your pocket (a short sentence), and then think about something else. Certainly don't talk about it, as that activates more of the brain to be involved in negative thinking. The brain learns to spend its time doing other things (in as little as a month), things that don't cause depression. This knowledge has been in print for a long time, but many psychiatrists just want to give you medication. "You are what you think" - there's something to that.

Yesterday's wisdom: Express your feelings
Today's smart strategy: Keep it to yourself

@had-enough - Yeah, well I guess it fits then don't it. and Made ya look. ha ha.

Here's another little bit of wisdom that will help relieve alot of stress in your lifetime, the sooner you learn it, the better! Generally speaking, most people in the world don't know what the f*ck their talking about. Trust your instincts and do what makes YOU feel good and leave the pundits to argue amongst themselves. You'll be much happier for it.

Just2reason, while that may work to a point-and I do think that it does-some things need to be worked out with another person as a sounding board. Sometimes the depressed person is depressed because of incorrect thinking about something, and talking about it will help them see things more rationally, thus helping the depression. Also, the depressed person may need to learn better coping skills with certain things, which the other person can help them with. Finally, the depressed person may have a chemical imbalance in their brain-and I assure you these things are real-and may need medication for a time, even a long time to correct that imbalance. No amount of writing and refocusing will help with a chemical imbalance. I have seen and observed all these things. Telling the person just to write down the negative, discard it, and focus on the positive when they needed other interventions only made them feel like a terrible failure, which greatly worsened the depression.

@seen too much...I think that as far as Just2Reason: you're both right. I guess that's the point of the article: there are no hard and fast rules for everything. You have to open yourself to what works best for you in each situation. Good article and good comments. Thank you both for sharing!

"People who talk endlessly about their problems are actually the ones at greater risk of depression."

There is a lot of truth to that statement.

My experience is that people who are constantly talking about their problems and berating their companions for 'lack of empathy' are also very insecure people who need attention, and when they don't get it, they get depressed.

dark chocolate saved me

When ever I get stressed out a big "fattie" is all that's needed.......just fire that baby up and feel the stress flow away.........I can't believe that weed is not legal for this alone......oh well........

So the next time you get your panties in a bunch, or feel like the whole worlds down on you, grab a friend and spark one up......you'll thank me.

@seen to much - Your reply reflects nothing but an affirmation of a very common, and incorrect approach utilizing prolonged chemical poisoning. Brooding over negative thoughts can cause the chemical imbalance you speak of. I Googled this, and here's top result, and there are hundreds of others - http://www.lifescript.com/Health/Conditions/Depression/Overthinking_It_Could_Be_Depressing_You.aspx This information is, and has been available for a long time. Medication may be needed at first, and with some people maybe a lot longer. The medication does help many people. With a few people, brooding over the negative may not be the problem, and there may not be a known alternative to prolonged medication. If a person isn't rational, it's unlikely you are going to give them that gift. You want to babysit them 24/7 so they look at everything "rationally?" You can give them the gift of how to control their thinking, which greatly effects their ability to be happy.

Finally, the depressed person may have a chemical imbalance in their brain-and I assure you these things are real-and may need medication for a time

and talking about it will help them see things more rationally

Yeah, we heard you the first time.

Read more articles, your sampling is too small.

@JBond - that's funny.

In other words--it simply concludes that over-simplifying solutions doesn't really help everyone. (Not sure where the grants and funding come in to this very common sense approach.)

Actually, in this article I see the same basic message as in past medical advice i.e. "listen to your body."

Basically, find what works for you and do it. Understand the what works for one person may exacerbate the problem in another. Simple.

This happens all the time...one day coffee is good for you the next it's not....enough already! I think this all has to do with the almight BUCK! It's a gross conspiracy! They are leading us with our nose rings...sheeple! Stop buying into it! We are logical people! Think it through! Do everything you need to do in moderation! Don't eat 5lbs a chocolate in a day! Eat it in a month! I agree with Ghost...you are the only person that really knows what's best for you!

That is how we continue to get grants and funding.

Please! Leave the conspiracy talk to Glenn Beck! Anyone who pays attention to actual science knows that these are not new ideas. Now, for those of you who want to talk about "the almighty BUCK," the point of this seems to be to combat misinformation, which is often spread by people trying to make money. These people would be those who try to sell you their "miracle" product. I would hope you know what I mean; ads for such products appear on web pages all the time: "Cheap way to get whiter teath"; "Dieting secrets used by hollywood celebrities"; "Cheaper than botox - the secret doctors don't want you to know about"; "The secrets of the acai berry." Need I go on??? There are people who do fall for these; if people didn't, there would be no reward in spending the money to advertise and these ads would no longer exist. Unfortunately, people on the side of reason find it necessary to continually re-educate the population. This is where you then get these ideas that "one day coffee is good for you, the next it's not." It's in part because there is a battle between those who are trying to profit and those who are out to spread knowledge. (This is not to say that coffee is "bad" for you. Like many things in life, there can be both positives and negatives; it is not simply black and white.)

Drink heavily.

Thanks for that bit of genius! I'll continue to live my life knowing that you plan on remaining stupid, ignorant, self-absorbed, and as judgemental as always. Oh, and then I'll actually read and follow the actual scientific findings...

Jame: You're probably right but at least for this brief moment it is ok to "fling a fit" (and then get over it), eat some dark chocalate, tell your troubles to your dog (the least judgemental friend you'll ever have), then go to bed early and sleep in the next day. Sharing your emotions with others is dangerous in so many ways anyway. I suspect a lot of people have been committed to an asylum in past centuries for sharing their feelings and then they went crazy.

Yeah, Mike, this may be a dumb seed but go look at some of the ones that produce political commentary. At least this one can be fun.

"Drink heavily."

Which will only create a whole passel of new problems; thus, creating more stress. :)

Remember, just because its been proven that no two snow flakes are alike, does not mean that we should stop awarding grants to those who wish to keep searching!

If nobody looked, you'd have never known anything about snowflakes nor James comments. I suppose both of you would simply prefer living in the dark ages, burning witches, and keeping your heads in the sand?

Two pieces of "common sense"...

Birds of a feather flock together. But... opposites attract. Which is true for the majority of people? I'm sure neither of you knows research for an answer. Hmmm... are you simply complaining about your lack of knowledge? Well, then... research it!

Unless you start to think about the cost of keeping them :)

calfroper---could not agree more! Having animals has saved ALL OF US a ton of psychiatrist bills...that should be a tagline for the ASPCA, Humane Society, etc, to get more abandoned shelter animals adopted!!!

Amen!! My horse keeps me sane!

I totally agree. My weekly riding lesson is the only thing that keeps me sane ... it's the highlight of my week. I'm working hard to get to a place in my life where I can afford a horse myself. Their gentle and loyal spirit takes away all my stress and anxiety.

Do what you love. Going into the woods does it for me. When concerns are reduced to "I need to get a fire lit" or "Dang, my hook's caught in a tree" stress just melts away...

I couldn't agree more. The time I get to spend with my horse every weekend is my escape from the rest of my life. He's a little green still, a little spooky, and when I'm focused on him, all the lists and worries in my mind just magically disappear. That horse is like my one indulgence every weekend and I can't help but smile when I see him enjoying himself. ...Or, when he's trying hard and listening and miraculously picks up the correct lead or something, and I feel like we're actually communicating...boy does that just make me glow!!

A barn full of dairy goats works well too! They sure can't figure out whats up when they see me sitting on the hillside, in the middle of their pasture, with a big glass of cabernet! They come up and "greet you" by licking your eyebrow, rubbing their head on your back, sniffing your hair...

My horse is great as well.

I don't have a horse, but I don't know what I'd do without my cats. They always seem to know when I'm stressed out.

Justover49,

They can't figure it out, but that sure wont stop them from trying! I agree with you, I'm completely unable to stay mad when out in the goat pasture. There's a young doe who thinks she's human, and liked to chill with us when we relax anywhere in view. The fencing does NOTHING against her when she wants to socialize :)

Ya never see a harley parked in front of a psychiatrist's office. ;)

I'll bet you would in Florida.

I completely agree! Also, mucking out a stall is great exercise on top of all that stress relief. :)

I get on my motorcycle and hit the rode for a hundred miles or so. Hard to think negative when you have to pay attention to what you are doing!

That's really cool sharing all your coping stratgies! Sometimes I destress by turning on a fun movie (or something fun and silly like 4 Weddings) and fold the laundry. I get the clutter down and the repetitive action is soothing. I used to work at a libary and sometimes getting into the stacks and straightening or shelving was just as good. Sometimes I sew (by hand) or paint and I find that to be very soothing sometimes. I WISH I could own a horse, but alas the allergies... Melding my prayer/meditation time with my swimming time works too. Calms the spirit and works the body!

I hate animals. Well, except the tasty ones.

Eeeuuuwwww!, Tim.

Critters do an amazing job of keeping us sane. Don't have room for horses at my townhome, but do have 3 cats and they help to remind me that life is a warm lap to curl up in and someone to keep you 'purring'. :)

"Learn to control your thoughts, don't let your thoughts control you." ~ old wise man

Or the biggest stressor of them all: money problems.

Best way to minimize or eliminate them is to live within or below your means. You would be surprised how much materialistic items run your life. Always working overtime to get the latest gadgets.

I have often said that I don't have a problem in the world that couldn't be solved with a boatload of cash. Give me a net worth figure that resembles an overseas telephone number and it'll be maximum relaxation with a permanent vacation from then on!

Sorry Jay...just saw an article last week, that said exercise wasn't good for you.....

Nightbreeze, you hit the nail on the head !!! I could solve all of my stress too with a huge pile of money that has no limit.

ELH,

LOL It's a pity I'm not a ridiculously wealthy person; I belive I'd be good at it!

Of course, in addition to exercise and money, the other great stress reducer: sex! :-)

The rich don't seem that happy and the ones who seem to be doing better than others are working to better the world.

Believe me when I say that I've always wanted to be a philanthropist! What would be the point of having all that money if you weren't doing things to help your fellow man? I can think of no more rewarding way to live a life and minimize stress, actually.

I am really surprised that the author did not mention probably the best way to reduce stress: exercise.

Sex works for me

I'll Second on a vote for Sex as the best stress reducer! Any supporters of this vote should lay down and say Aye. Please, only one Aye will do.

The only way that money will work is if you have a never ending supply if not you will be stressing on where the next dollar/million will be coming from to buy the newest latest greatest piece of junk.

Why is it, then, that all those rich celebrities never seem to be happy? If money is the answer, that is. Many of them act like they are miserable! A lot of them wind up in rehab and in psychiatrist's offices. Why is that, if money is the key to having no stress? I don't know about that.

I'm not stressed about money, and we're long-term unemployed! My secret is that I pray and believe that God will provide for us-not that we aren't looking hard for work-in fact, we spend more than 40 hours per week looking for jobs and applying for them and have been for months. Also we watch the budget. We're not idiots.

I had a horse while growing up, but obviously can't afford one now. We do have an aging dog who is becoming very affectionate in his old age. Prayer is free, and that helps me a lot with stress-especially (believe it or not) prayers that are sung. Music has always been a huge part of my life, and singing is also free. Setting boundaries with other people to protect myself is free, and that decreases stress tremendously. Despite what one poster said, I believe exercise helps with stress. Some of the old wisdom works!

m not stressed about money, and we're long-term unemployed! My secret is that I pray and believe that God will provide for us-not that we aren't looking hard for work

Then it's not working. When will people learn? Employed or unemployed it has absolutely nothing to do with God and everything to do with you and the state of the economy. Stop ceding to an imaginary deity what is really within your own grasp.

And stop telling people how to deal with their stress. Praying to God is an awesome stress reliever for those who believe in Him.

actually research is showing that exercise is not as big a factor in reducing stress or depression. In fact the results are shown to be nill. Doesn't mean you should stop exercising though. On a personal note I've exercised everyday of my life and honestly the suggestions on this post are far more effective than exercise.

Scott said "stop ceding to an 'imaginary deity' what is really within your own grasp." Did you not read all of seen too much's post? Along with prayer and resting in God (who by the way is not imaginary no matter how angry you protest this) Seen is living on a budget and looking for a job. Seen is not stressing because Seen is doing his/her part and trusting God for the rest. That's not ceding: that's COOPERATING. What's your beef with God, anyway? If you're not interested just say no thanks. And I agree with Seen...resting in your faith while doing your part is absolutely a stress releiver and prayer is absolutely free!

And stop telling people how to deal with their stress. Praying to God is an awesome stress reliever for those who believe in Him.

The word 'him' should not be capitalized unless it's at the beginning of a sentence. Also, The Flying Spaghetti Monster is a female anyway.

What's your beef with God, anyway?

I have no problem with an imaginary entity. I also have no beef with the tooth fairy or Santa Claus. However, if people drug out belief Santa Claus as an answer to real-world problems, I think I'd have something to say about that to. These self-righteous religious nuts love to use the word god, like it's a given that the imaginary man in the sky exists. He doesn't. I just enjoy pointing that out to people.

Exercise is a great stress reducer. Unfortunately for me, it would undermine the rule in the article of "Do something you love to do."

I gotta agree: sex should have been #1 on the list!

I hate exercise. I think that would ADD stress. Sex works best.

"I am really surprised that the author did not mention probably the best way to reduce stress: exercise"

He did, Jay, in point #2. It is in with a bunch of other ideas for stress relief.

Aye, pjw-708550: "...any repetitive activity that keeps your attention in the present moment, including jogging, swimming, painting, walking, ..."

He also mentioned praying, which I guess could be considered exercise if you're a Quaker ;-)

LOL! Thanks for my morning laugh, Anonymous Horse, that was a good one! :)

It didn't say they weren't useful tools. Re-read the article. Experts merely said the obvious: they aren't for everyone. (hardly too sensational)

Uhhh, they didn't say that.

Uhhh yes they did say that. It was the headline of the article that said if deep breathing and meditation weren't helping your stress that new studies show that they often don't help. There was just a large study released 2 weeks ago that said taking a deep breathe stopped the fight or flight response, stopping the release of cortisol. Anyone can say anything they want in the name of "a new study finds....."

TY Diane. It is very easy to show that deep breathing with a long exhale decreases sympathetic and increases parasympathetic tone using heart rate variability analysis. I have a paper at the upcoming AAPB meeting showing it decreases C-reactive protein as well. It is unfortunate that many people will simply read the headline and think these methods don't work.

Edwin, the article didn't say that. It did say that nothng, including meditation, works for everyone.

You're found that meditation works FOR YOU, and so you have a stress-reduction (AKA relaxation) technique. Not everyone has found theirs, and that includes not everyone who has tried meditation.

Diane and Edwin, the article says that such methods don't work often, not that they never work.

And of course breath control can be helpful. Just think of the difference in reaction between those listening to Gregorian chants and those listening to Hitler's staccato rants.

The problem is that breathe control also isn't the be all and end all of relaxation techniques. Yes, it can change physiological responses to stress, but it can't change the stressor.

For some people, meditation is the secret to serenity, but for others, it's a fast track to frayed nerves

Thought I would quote the article for those who read and hear what they want, rather than what is. Personaly, I fit the others category...

To all of you that don't seem to get it, we are not talking about the wording in the article itself, it is the wording of the title and byline that are misleading and some people don't read the article, just the headline. Also, this is not something about one person or another, EVERYONE (unless they have a pacemaker) increases vagal activity and decreases sympathetic activity ("stress") with deep breaths with prolonged exhales. It works for everyone, it is a basic physiological fact.

No the article does not say that, but I see Edwin's Dianne's point. Generally, people will see the headline and not get past it. Most are not thoughtful eanough or reasoned eanough to get past their attention deficits. This proves problematic for established stress reduction techniques. Personally, meditation is physically painful for me therefore I use other stress reduction styles. Do what works for you, right?

The posts here seem well thought out. I was suprised. I think my new stress technique will be to avoid the political discussion boards and move to the health/life boards where there are more reasoned and intelligent individuals.

Uhhh, if you're not going to read the article why even click on the link and comment about it? How ridiculous.

for some things in life as i raise my pet ...peeve's ...i found the phrase

Owa Tagoo Siam repeated faster and faster ...gives me a different perspective.

on others hobbies relieve stress ,venting relieves stress ...even hugs unasked works

Meditation is a problem for me as well because of certain techniques that have been used with me in the past during meditation other than just the relaxation and deep breathing which caused intense anxiety and distress. Now I feel the anxiety rather than the relaxation if I attempt any form of meditation. Oddly, the same thing happens with accupuncture. I guess that's life.

This article is too stressful.

Amen...and oh for all of you unbelievers out there...there is a load of ideas in the Bible that actually benefit your well being...mind, body and soul....don't care if you like that or not....

The book of Proverbs is a good place to start if your looking for advise on how to stay out of stressful circumstances, and handle the ones that do come your way.

Except that he doesn't exist.

Yes, abdicate all personal responsibility to an invisible man in the sky, that way you can't be blamed for anything! You thumpers make me SICK.

God doesn't exist.

"Just because you say it with conviction doesn't make it so." - line from The Last Action Hero.

Mothi,

Sounds good to me! Where do I sign up to get him to pay my rent?

Speaking from firsthand experience, this is Absolutely true. I've struggled with intense anxiety all my life, trying different medications and testing various techniques. It never really occurred to me to ask God to help me specifically regarding anxiety until recently. I can't even begin to describe what's happened so far-- actually I can -- the only word is "miraculous."

If anyone doesn't believe it, that's fine, simply ask God yourself. Literally, ask him right now. Find our for yourself...

Your over-simplistic, childish post is a major stressor for myself, and for millions and millions of others around the world.

It's time to grow up and understand that there is nothing that any so-called deity can do for your that you are not perfectly capable of doing for yourself. Throw away that crutch and join the rest of the grown-ups, please.

Cursalius, it makes no sense whatsoever to ask for help from a fictional character.

In fact, if I must ask for help from a fictional character, I'll go to Mr Spock first. At least his help would be rational.

Spunkygirl,

It is hard to take lessons in morality from a 'god' who taught one follower to run a monetary scam on 2 different kings (Abraham) and taught others to massacre every living thing in several communities so they could steal the land. You guys! I swear! Lets not forget that the bible WASN'T written by god and it isn't the literal truth either. Some of the advice is good and other parts are designed to keep everyday people in their place and humble towards abusive masters.. Other parts are written to glorify one people as the 'chosen' of god. What malarkey!

rp, fair enough. Let's take a step backwards. Your statement is predicated on the premise that God is fictional, but the validity of the premise needs to be established before it can support the conclusion.

So, what is your logical argument that God is fictional?

Mothi

Create a bond with God and relate to Him. You will stress just disappear like magic.

Please, tell that to all the kids laying in a hospital dying of cancer and who are still waiting on their prayers to be answered.

I will talk to your god on December 25th when he appears with his bag of presents hopefully his sidekicks the easter bunny and the tooth fairy will be there. Meeting the holy trilogy in one place and at one time would be just miraculous.

Data,

Unfortunately there's not a simple, post-sized answer for this but it is talked about elsewhere a lot.

I would only ask you to consider that the scope of God's perception is infinitely larger than ours. We suffer, children suffer, there is pain. But isn't it possible that, sorry to use a cliche but, in the greater scheme of things which we aren't capable of perceiving, that the God who was capable of creating the universe knows something we don't? If WE were suddenly capable of perceiving our suffering as God does, would we still perceive it the same? Or would we see a "big picture" that we didn't see before that suddenly made everything make sense - including our pain.

I realize there's a lot of "woulds" and "coulds" and undefined universals (perception, experience, suffering, etc) above but again, this is just a post-sized foray into possibilities of thinking beyond our day to day existence and understanding of the world.

Darn...I retract the second half of my last statement. How dissapointing.

heh believing in anything just be it.. the sky is blue cause its sad ..is a focus of control that in itself helps relieve the frustration of lack of control ...

So, what is your logical argument that God is fictional?

There is no evidence for God. Most importantly, there's no evidence that praying to God does anything (beyond a possible placebo effect). I can never understand how people can pray, have it not answered, and then somehow do it again thinking that this time it will work. That's just plain dumb.

Every time someone survives some calamity and indicates that they thank God for saving them, I cringe. What does that mean? God hated the people that he let die? Did God love Gabby Giffords but hate the 9-year old girl who died in her place?

In reality, it's all random. I can't guarantee peace of mind from knowing this truth. However, I'd rather have some angst than to voluntarily pull the wool over my own eyes.

All you unbelievers,

Why don't you put an honest effort in trying it, maybe you'll be surprised.

I haven't been to church in awhile but I have used that method in issues like anger at an exwife that was unfaithful, I prayed to God and told God that I forgive that woman. Problem was solved.

Another occassion, I was dumped by a woman that like to jump around from one man to another, caused me some heart ache, I prayed and received an answer to confide in a friend and problem solved.

The stuff works, I'm a witness to it.

You can disbelieve fall you want, but as far as I'm concerned you know nothing about what you are against. You do not know what you are talking about.

All you unbelievers,

There's no such thing as an 'unbeliever'. There's the rational, and the irrational. Believers choose to be irrational. That's their choice.

Why don't you put an honest effort in trying it, maybe you'll be surprised.

Because there is precisely the same amount of evidence supporting The Flying Spaghetti Monster being God as any of the plethora of beings ascribed as God by world religions. Not only would one have to decide to believe in something irrational, one would have to roll a dice and choose which version of irrationality to subscribe to.

haven't been to church in awhile but I have used that method in issues like anger at an exwife that was unfaithful, I prayed to God and told God that I forgive that woman. Problem was solved.

Wow! That makes no sense whatsoever. What exactly was solved? Did time get reversed and your wife crossed her legs? You guys are unbelievable.

Another occassion, I was dumped by a woman that like to jump around from one man to another, caused me some heart ache, I prayed and received an answer to confide in a friend and problem solved.

Maybe you are mistaken and you read the advice in a fortune cookie, or perhaps a Magic 8-Ball. If you are too stupid to know that talking with a friend about your problems might provide reassurance, it's explains why you are so deluded.

You do not know what you are talking about.

Ouch. That hurts. After all, I live my life waiting for ignorant people's acceptance.

That's nice Scott.

I can only speak for myself. I believe in God, but my stress did not disappear like magic. It was a gradual thing. It came from me gradually letting things go little by little. I was not willing to put all my trust in a God I couldn't see at first. It had to be proved to me little by little. A lot of bad things have happened to me, and my human dad was not the most trustworthy; so I had no reason to believe that this God would be either. Honestly, at first I believed just to keep from going to hell.

We kids did pray for my dad because he was a bad alcoholic and was certain to die soon due to his self-destructive lifestyle. It was likely to be a horrible death, in fact; and we were afraid of how things might turn out-he had already gone head on into a telephone pole without a seat belt but had walked away from that and he was beginning to talk about taking hard drugs and to threaten suicide. For ten years we prayed, and nothing happened. In the last year I used to listen to a song about another man who had been totally lost but had been saved; and I would think that if that man could be saved my dad could be, but nothing happened. Others told us to give up, but we didn't. We had interventions on our own with no guidance-we just winged it.

One day we had signed papers to commit my dad to a rehab, and I called my sibling to see what had happened. I was told that my dad had died, but that he had been saved the day before. That day he had been planting the last of his crops, then the next day he had suddenly dropped dead of a heart attack. Most of you would find this a tragedy, but to us it was not at all; because our prayers of ten years had been answered. Now all our fears about what might happen were over. After the funeral in Mississippi, I came back to Florida; and that sunday in church the worship leader, who knew nothing about my dad or our prayers for him, sang the rather obscure song that I had been listening to for a year when I thought that if that very lost man could be saved then my dad could be. You may consider this a coincidence, but think of how unlikely it is that that very sunday someone who knew nothing about us or my dad or even that we had been gone would sing a rather obscure song that was never played on the radio-that happened to be the very song I had listened to for a year while praying for my dad to be saved and thinking that if the man in the song could be saved, then my dad surely could.

I believe God answered that prayer; and I saw him answer other prayers like curing me of phobias like a thunderstorm phobia I had when I moved to Florida, the lightning capital of the US. You'd have to confirm that one with my husband, but he could tell you that I used to duck and run whenever it thundered; now I LOVE storms-so much so that my daughter and I used to sit in the garage to watch them come in. She could tell you about that. Both of them could tell you that if there is a tornado warning I'm more likely to be outside looking for the funnel than inside looking for shelter where my husband wants me to be.

I've also looked into archaeology, history, and science extensively. I am neither ignorant nor a moron. I have discussed various religions with those who practice them. I graduated from one of the top liberal arts universities in the country with high grades, a school that pushed research so that I know how to tell if a study is bogus or not as long as I can read the actual study. (Many, if not most, of the studies in the news are not worth the paper they are printed on.)

My belief is based on years of answered prayer and on seeing God come through for me. And, yes, there have been "no" answers; and I've seen what God has done with those answers as well. Those of you who are jumping to conclusions by saying God doesn't love someone because they died and does love someone because they lived are not looking at the whole picture because you do not know what can come of things down the road. You don't know what horrible things have happened to me. You may say, "You haven't died, have you?" If I told you what happened, I bet some of you would say I might have been better off dead. But I tell you now that good has come of those things-yes those horrible things.

I'm only speaking for myself. But I'm not an idiot or a moron. And I don't have all the answers. I have looked around, though; and I have lived it. And what I believe now is not what I was raised to believe.

God doesn't answer any prayers. There is no deity. It's all luck, both bad and good.

I've been an atheist since I was about 10. I was in a terrible car crash when I was 17. I lived through it. I was even clinically dead several times and brought back. Miracle? No. Luck. I was lucky. There are many people who are "good Christians" and pray their ass off and die horrible deaths. It's luck people.

By the way, there was no bright light or warm glow in the afterlife. Just darkness.

If I have to pray to anyone, I usually pray to the egyptian god seth XD he had an interesting story, and he's dark enough for me to imagine he can understand human emotion (not like those "angels" who only live to love god, a.k.a. serve mindlessly) or even god himself who was never human and can't possibly understand the things I go through.

Either that, or some of the greek or roman gods, they're usually more similar to humans (in their emotions and stuff, since they feel anger, love, jealousy, even lust)

but, you know, that's just me. =P (if I have to pray to FSM I tend to get hungry, and I think that's probably blasphemy or something...)

I like George Carlin's answer. He said that he prays to the sun. The number one reason, "..I can see the sun!". Plus, it gives warmth and provides energy for all life.

All of us who have personally experienced a miracle after praying want so much for others to understand and feel what we have felt. But I also know that before I began believing in God, nothing anyone said could make me believe either. Actually, the more I was preached to, the harder it was for me to believe. It really turned me off. But, Jesus found me in my darkest times, and the joy and peace I felt when I knew my prayers had been heard was like nothing I'd ever felt before and I know it was heavenly. I don't go to church and I wouldn't call myself religious. I just know what I feel and what healed me.

Two books that may change unbelieving minds: Heaven Is For Real and The Boy Who Came Back From Heaven. Both true stories from small children who had near death experiences and saw Heaven.

The almighty Satan lightens my load.

All of us who have personally experienced a miracle after praying want so much for others to understand and feel what we have felt

It's the placebo effect. You want to believe, so you do. I want the truth, so I'm rational.

I've never wanted there to be a god. I would be seriously mad if I found out that mankind we're some sort of sadistic tamagachi for a deity, like some sick twisted version of The Sims. A god is too easy an answer. The truth is much more interesting then make-believe fantasies.

Scott,

I am a Christian, but I want to say I do appreciate your posts and the posts of other athiests. I agree heartily with DataLink who challenged the notion that people under extraordinary suffering such as dying of cancer , especially children, will just have all their stress and troubles melt away by simply believing or taking their troubles to the Lord. It is an unbiblical premise. The Lord never promised us stress free or pain free lives. Its simply not found in the Bible. In fact, the Bible warns of great suffering and pain while on earth. God does, however, promise to be with us so we are never alone, he will give us strength to endure it when we have no strength left of our own. Walking with the Lord is sweeter when going through lifes trials, but it does not take them away.

He loves us with a love greater than human comprehension and is grieved when He sees the pain we go thru, even your pain, Scott, which is greatly evident in your posts. He is not limited the way a human is limited. He has perfect and complete knowledge and He has a greater understanding of the world around us. He also has a plan. But as you may already know, He will not force you like a robot to choose to believe He exists, or even to follow him.

Have you ever opened yourself to the possibility that God might exist? Why not? I speak this not out of sarcasm, but compassion....What are you afraid of? Afraid of not being in control, afraid of being wrong, afraid of having to acknowledge that there is a "higher power" that has allowed you to suffer what you have had to endure as well as millions of others that have died horrible deaths, endured horrific diseases or suffered cruelty at the hands of others? I know many struggle with what kind of supposedly just and righteous, monster of a God would allow such wickedness to run rampant and to allow it to happen to His "chosen" people. These are fair questions. But again, God is not human. In our limited and finite human minds, we think we all know what it means to be fair and just and expect God to follow our standards. But our thinking is contaminated by sin , and limited by our humanity. God has perfect justice, perfect righteousnessand He makes no bones about ti, His judgement is coming. The evil in this world, which seemingly is given free reign and goes about unchecked and unpunished will one day deal with the wrath of God. His timing is not our timing. His ways are not our ways. But like children, we do not always understand the ways of our Father. Martys in Heavn cry out now "How long, Oh Lord" and want justice! We will, though Scott, as belivers one day understand completely all the things that do not make sense to us now, and we will Praise Him for what He has done.

I invite you, hey, I dare you to a 30 day test. It has to be done with sincereity of heart, Scott, and only you will know if you are going into this sincere or not. get a copy of the Bible, and read thru the book of John one chapter a day or so for a month. Should only take a few minutes. That is it. Only before you read, ask God, out of sincerity of heart, to reveal Himself and His son Jesus to you if indeed He is real. Nothing else is needed, just sincerity of heart. Do this every day for 30 days and see what happens. If there is no God, then you have absolutely nothing to lose, right? Hey, read it before betime and have it help you fall asleep if you think it won't help you do anything but make you drowsy, ha ha.

I really wonder, Scott, if the Lord has something planned for you. You are a passionate athiest. You understand how athiests think, the hurts that many people exp[erience, and if you have been brought back from the dead several times as you said you have, God may have huge plans to use you to reach out to others if you ever discover there is a God. Sorry if that comment ticks you off. If it does, then take me up on my challenge and prove me wrong. Read the book of John, only with one chapter a day, NO more. But you have to ask sincerely if there really is a God, that He would reveal himself to you in the 30 days you give Him, and sincerely be open to it. If after 30 days you are not convinced, then I will appreciate you have given it an honest try. And if nothing else, you will have good material each night to put you to sleep, right? cheaper than ambien and without all the side effects! :-)

I eventually just skipped to the end of the responses. I do not believe in a God. I do understand the comfort people find in belief in a God. It means there is someone in charge, providing order and meaning to the universe. I think to some extent it is a positive thing...and naturally many people who believ are great people ( just like many who do not believe are).

The only problem I have really is that God or Gods were initially given credit for everything in order for people to understand their surroundings....and as we study different aspects of life through science ( which is very self critical) we find out the real reason things behave the way they do. Science may not provide all the answers...but just because we don't have an answer yet, we do not provide a false answer which is what faith does in many cases.

I know it is hard to discount a God that you have been told from childhood is the ultimate support around the order of your lives. It is a comfort that is scary to let go of. I think it is alright for people to keep believing if it helps them...but I do get a little concerned with creationism, or people that believe the world is 4000 years old. I know people that don't believe in dinosaurs. When belief trumps things that can be proven, then I think we are in trouble.

Ultimately we can disagree on the existence of God, but I can still like and appreciate those people I disagree with on this one thing because in many cases they really are good people. We shouldn't use disbelief/belief in a God to define us to the extent that it overshadows what we have in common as human beings just trying to get thru life and enjoy it.

I really wonder, Scott, if the Lord has something planned for you

No, because there is no lord. The whole "it's God's plan" BS is a cop out. It can be used to explain anything that happens that doesn't seem to conform to people's perception of good.

By the way, there's either free will or there is "God's plan". There cannot be both. Of course, I know it's the former. However, you deluded Jesus freaks will go on believe in a world that cannot exist; one where you have choices in your action and a invisible man in the sky controls everything down to the last molecule. You are free to revel in your delusion. I have no doubt that believing in nonsense can make you feel better. However, I decided long ago that what was important to me was truth and taking the world as it is, not as we wish it to be. Sometimes that truth comes with pain. I say so be it. I accept it. Not everyone is that strong. I understand.

By the way, I've never done drugs for similar reason. I want to look at the world as it is, not some distorted lens. Ironically, both religion and drugs serve a similar purpose to dull the pain of existence. The only difference is the delusion of religious belief can be maintained through an entire lifetime, though I suspect deep down most people know the truth but won't admit it. Drugs wear off.

"Religion is the opiate of the masses" -Karl Marx

Amen to that brother.

Actually Scott, Christians believe in freewill or else the Christian God would be responsible for sin. It may be a case of having it both ways...but freewill is one of the key aspects of Christianity.

They believe in free will but it's incompatible with "God's plan". You can't get around it. It's a contradiction.

If God has a plan for the world and things are going to happen a certain way (e.g. the second coming and Armageddon) then he has to control everything that happens up to that point. Otherwise, someone could mess up his plans by exercising their free will.

If there were a God, he/she would definitely be responsible for sin. He/she created everything right? Even Satan was created by God. If God was omnipotent, then he/she could destroy Satan in a second.

I think if God did exist as it describes in the Bible, then he/she would be the embodiment of evil. I would never worship such a despicable entity even if I were convinced of his/her existence.

In the end, I'm tired of wasting my brainpower on trying to figure out why irrational people believe in what is obviously made up. Religious believe is a glitch in human nature. It's an unfortunate side effect of our consciousness. I am so happy to be free of this glitch so that I may observe the world how it is. I wish you all were as fortunate.

Scott wrote (9.18):

Every time someone survives some calamity and indicates that they thank God for saving them, I cringe. What does that mean? God hated the people that he let die? ... In reality, it's all random.

Even in the Bible divine intervention was extremely rare. In a world alienated from God, we are all subject to "time and unforeseen occurrence," or random chance (Eccl 9:11). Jesus commented on this belief (that if someone dies, God is displeased with them) when a tower collapsed. He said (Luke 13:4), "Those eighteen upon whom the tower in Siloam fell, thereby killing them, do you imagine that they were proved greater debtors [sinners] than all other men inhabiting Jerusalem?" No, in a world ruled by Satan bad things will continue to happen by accident and intent, and people will continue to senselessly die - until Christ rules the earth.

As for free will, the existence of God doesn't change that. If a good and loving human father teaches and raises his children properly, but his children willfully disobey - is it the fathers fault? Does their father desire they become involved in evil; for example, by lying, murdering and fostering hate? Satan and man had a perfect beginning, but both misused their free will by choosing to disobey God.

Even in the Bible divine intervention was extremely rare.

He controls everything. It wouldn't be a matter of intervention. It would be a matter of not sending the hurricane/tornado/volcano etc. The god of the Bible is a murderer of the highest order and wouldn't deserve anyone's praise even if he weren't imaginary.

Once again, it's all random. Every once in awhile a church is hit by a tornado and destroyed. I always laugh when I hear it. My response is always the same, "I guess they didn't pray hard enough." Yet, instead of these lemmings waking up to the reality that there is no god, they double-down on their delusion by pretending it was part of some grand plan. It was nothing of the sort. Their church was in the path of a natural phenomenon that is determined by the principles of physics.

By the way, you can save your theologian gobbledy gook for someone else. My girlfriend has a masters degree in theology. Even she has now come around to the reality that God is a fiction. I guess it helps that she has a 150 IQ. The rest of you who aren't so "blessed" I guess are out of luck.

He controls everything.

If I believed God controlled everything, I would agree with you. You are correct, that at this time man is subject to random chance (#9.34).

If I believed God controlled everything, I would agree with you.

Well, as The Church Lady would say, "Isn't that conveeenient?" God has supposedly layed out Earth's fate. There are many people talking about "end times" and such. Yet, those same people miraculously believe in man's free will. It can't be both. You can't have your cake and eat it to.

By the way, he purportedly created the entire universe according to young Earth devotees. Thus, he's omnipotent. He knows exactly what will happen and thus is responsible for any evil done, along with the normal evil he perpetrates in the form of disease and disaster.

You can always shut down a religious freak by simply asking, "Who created God?". A lot of religious people's resistance to a universe lacking design is due to their inability to imagine something eternal without some higher purpose. Yet, they don't extend this unease to the concept of an eternal and infinite deity. Who designed the designer?

In my experience, not only do religious nuts have trouble with the concept of not knowing the answer, but they are doubly blown away by the idea that there is no answer. For instance, there's the question of "Why?". This question assumes there's a reason. I never understand why we go into this question with that assumption. There doesn't have to be a reason and in all probability there isn't one. It just is.

Say the weaterman gives a 100% chance of rain and you are going for a walk. You can choose to take an umbrella or not and get wet. God has set a time of the end. We can take note or not - our choice. My bad choice or your good one aren't "God's Will," they are our choices, our free will.

Say the weaterman gives a 100% chance of rain and you are going for a walk. You can choose to take an umbrella or not and get wet.

The weatherman doesn't create the rain. God supposedly does. Bad analogy.

God has set a time of the end.

Actually he hasn't since he doesn't exist.

We can take note or not - our choice.

Everything is our choice. Humans are in control of their destiny, barring a large asteroid or local gamma ray burst. It's a cop out to pretend a god has a hand on what we do and how we treat each other.

My bad choice or your good one aren't "God's Will," they are our choices, our free will.

I'm still not buying it. The New Testament lays out pretty clearly specific events that will happen during the "end times". For those specific things to happen specific people have respond in specific ways. If there truly were free will then, people could choose to louse up "God's plan". For instance, we could recognize the anti-Christ and choose to not follow the script layed out in the Bible. It's precisely because God knows everything everyone will do that he can predict with accuracy what will happen at the end.

Face it, you can't have it both ways. You can pretend to reconcile free will and "God's plan" but it's a load of nonsense. You only do it to avoid the inevitable conclusion that all that you believe in is a bunch of hooey.

The weatherman doesn't create the rain. God supposedly does. Bad analogy.

Cute. How about this: If God commands it to rain but warns you beforehand, you have choices. You can get wet, or take precautions. Prophecy and free will side by side. If God further says some people will get wet and some won't, that's still prophecy and still free will. We choose to ignore it or not, just as we can pay attention to a weather report (or not).

Everything is our choice. Humans are in control of their destiny.

Correct. You are also correct that in the time of the end people will respond in "specific ways." Foreknowledge on God's part doesn't predict individual actions, just actions of groups of people. Some will do this, others will do that. But every individual makes his own choice and has free will.

Many people believe the anti-Christ is one man/woman, yet 1 John 2:18 warns of "many antichrists" (plural) and a just a few verses later gives the definition of antichrist. Again, you were correct when you wrote:

we could recognize the anti-Christ and choose to not follow the script layed out in the Bible.

Some will. Most won't.

Cute. How about this: If God commands it to rain but warns you beforehand, you have choices. You can get wet, or take precautions. Prophecy and free will side by side. If God further says some people will get wet and some won't, that's still prophecy and still free will. We choose to ignore it or not, just as we can pay attention to a weather report (or not).

When does God warn about the disasters and calamities he sends our way? So, if I have an opportunity to make a choice and get killed, it's free will but if I don't have a choice and get killed then it's God's plan? Again. How convenient. Since when does God warn people about a tornado, or is the simple act of living in the midwest the free will part? Is there any place on Earth where you are completely safe from natural disasters? Effectively, we have no way of avoiding putting ourselves in God's crosshairs one way or another.

Correct. You are also correct that in the time of the end people will respond in "specific ways." Foreknowledge on God's part doesn't predict individual actions, just actions of groups of people. Some will do this, others will do that. But every individual makes his own choice and has free will.

So God is a probability theorist? That makes no sense. It doesn't take group action to change the future. Sometimes things hinge on one person's actions. There's no way a God that wanted things to go a certain way in the macro would allow micro free will to muck with his plan. You can try your best to word it but you simply can't polish a turd.

Many people believe the anti-Christ is one man/woman, yet 1 John 2:18 warns of "many antichrists" (plural) and a just a few verses later gives the definition of antichrist.

There is no anti-Christ, either now or ever. There are evil people surely. Just from the last century we have Stalin, Hitler, Tojo, Paul Pot, Hussein, Bin Laden, and Bush. However, they are individual people choosing to do evil. God has nothing to with it because he simply doesn't exist. He's a convenient contrivance brought about to pray on the weak-minded.

The truth that there is no deity is sometimes a bitter pill. I pity those who have trouble swallowing it. Over the years, I have learned to tolerate believers. Bless their little hearts, they know not what they do.

Scott, my point is that free will coexists with "God's plan" because "God's plan" isn't dependant on what you or I do. "God's plan" includes the end of wickedness and the establishing of His kingdom on earth. You and I can be a part of it, or not. Nowhere in the Bible have I seen my name and what I am fated to become or do. I have a choice.

There's no way a God that wanted things to go a certain way in the macro would allow micro free will to muck with his plan.

"God's Will" can be defied, but His plan will move forward. For instance, the Bible commands people in act in certain ways, yet many ignore and defy those commands. Does it change the outcome - are they somehow going to stop the coming of God's Kingdom? If you wear a raincoat will it affect the chances of rain? Of course not. Neither will anything you or I do affect the coming of God's Kingdom - although our actions will affect our personal outcome.

As posted earlier, right now we live in a world ruled by wickedness, so bad things happen. Badness is not due to God, it is because men are greedy, corrupt and wicked.

There is no anti-Christ, either now or ever.

That depends on the definition of "anti-Christ."

That's why they say "For some People." They've covered their butts.

I think it all boils down to:

Live is short. Don't make it miserable for yourself and everybody around you.

Oh, and one other thing - you're not the center of the universe.

Agreed! I play roller derby and I don't care how much stress I have going into practice, after three hours of hard skating and hitting people, I walk away feeling GREAT! Sweat it out!

that sounds AWESOME!

Does masturbation count?

Well, I was an exercise enthusiast and NEVER missed an opportunity to stay in tip top shape for the past 32 years of my life. Result? I have already had surgery to remove a herniated disk that was crushing a major nerve that ran from my neck to the tip of my right hand finger. Had to have ER surgery so I didn't end up jumping from a 10 story window. Additionally, found out that my entire neck is akin to crackled glass, and I WILL have to have a rod inserted to keep me upright, at some point. I also have two snap, crackle and pop knees that resulted from aerobics and running.

I won't deny that working out felt great and made me feel even better back in the day. That said, ANYTHING is excess is just too much! All things in moderation, is my new mantra. Whether it's taking a daily walk on the beach, enjoying a glass of exceptional champagne, keeping a pet companion or 2 but NOT more than you can actually provide for, outings with friends, down time and all too critical alone time are most helpful, putting phones & computers down from time to time and stepping away from a constant influx of news that's almost useless to use, staying active in neighborhood, charity or religious communities if that's your bag , enjoying your children if you have any, taking time to take in the extraordinary beauty that surrounds us, and for God's sake LIGHTEN UP! I thank God everyday for my sense of humor. If I could not laugh, even at myself, I'd be knutz!

Also keep in mind that there are those pesky underlying and, more often than not, undiagnosed psychological issues that may require appropriate exploration, diagnosis and treatment. We must be understanding that not all people can help themselves when there are chemical imbalances that affect the brain much like diabetes affects the body. In these situations, good psychiatric help, proper medication (as required) and a loving, supportive home environment are crucial.

Generally speaking, take control over your life in every way possible, and remember this one bit of sage advice: "Idle hands are the Devil's workshop!"

Surfing Ponto & walking my dogs. That's It !!!

Do you "beep" when you back up?

That is simply awesome! Giggling at your comment also helped reduce my stress!

For you - do what works best try new things if something isn't working (give it a fair chance). I like meditation and exercise - one alone doesn't seem to work as well.

You're both right. Jeff, you've found what works for you, and waukone, you understand that nothing works for everyone, and each of us must find our own best relaxation technique.

Jeff, if somene ever asks you how to handle stress, suggest exercise, but don't insist on it. It's something to try, but it's one of many things to try. Encourage that someone to give it a real try, and if it's not helping, then encourage that person to try other things.

For most of us, finding that right, for us, technique starts with returning to something that you used to enjoy

I meditate about exercising.

Tequila person myself.

Yep I agree completely. Good thing my cats are the kind who always crave attention.

Petting a warm, soft, purring cat is the best.

It works for Bond villains.

Your husband gets no relief from stroking a pussy? Time to consult a divorce attorney.

AND humor!